he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize