I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
