So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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