haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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