I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize