the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm sobbing to NWA
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
