that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
