I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
