I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
be right there i have to get my cape
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
