Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry TEXAS_REBEL_YELL hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(734): View more from Michigan

I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted

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(540): View more from Virginia

she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.

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(630): View more from Illinois

I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.

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(713): View more from Texas

I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.

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(440): View more from Ohio

Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.

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(518): View more from New York

They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower

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(425): View more from Washington

Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.

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(301): View more from Maryland

My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?

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