We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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