Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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