She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
