I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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