yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
