He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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