I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
