did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
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Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
