those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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