Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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