I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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