he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
BRING THE BAGELS
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
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