Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
