he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
