The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
