No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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