I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
