its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
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