Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
