i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
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