the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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