Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
