I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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