i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
