it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
