why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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