dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
