Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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