Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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