so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
