he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
This is my gift to your gina
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
