she was so not down for the gang bang
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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