Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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