Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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