I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
