Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
