I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
