How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
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