I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Randomize
