Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize