i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize