So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Even my vagina gasped.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
