It was confusing and full of hummus
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
